Maybe You've Just Outgrown the Basket

Look at this photo and think about what you see.

Each spring I buy flowers to put into hanging baskets along the front patio. The last few years I have bought petunias because they're pretty and the hummingbirds like them.

This spring I was surprised to see what looked like a little petunia plant sprouting up from the ground below the basket. As it became bigger and then formed buds, I could see that yes, it was a volunteer petunia. We didn't plant it and I was surprised to see it since petunias are annuals.

While I was pleased to see it, I didn't get too attached. We have a large rabbit and deer population here and if the bunnies can reach it, they eats it. One year I had a basket of petunias sitting on the patio within easy reach and it was shorn to the dirt in one night. However, for whatever reason, this plant has been left alone to grow and bloom all summer.

Look at the photo again. Do you see the difference in the two plants?

The basket petunia is looking a little sad to be honest. The foliage is drying out despite frequent watering. It has no more room to spread out in the basket and even though the flowers still look good, it's overall not healthy-looking. The ground petunia is looking great, the foliage is green and it can spread as far as it wants to. Nothing is keeping it in one place.

The two plants had no "say" in where they were planted, but you do.

Are you blooming in a place that looks good from the outside but inside you are screaming for something else? You know there's more but you feel like you can't get to it? Or you feel limited by something holding you back? Or maybe you have completed what you needed to do in your current "basket" and it's time to move on.

Maybe it's time to get out of the basket.

Sometimes we stay because the basket is comfortable.

It's familiar. It's pretty. From the outside, everything looks fine. We've learned how to survive there. We know what is expected of us, and we've become very good at meeting those expectations.

But sometimes the very thing that once supported us begins to limit us.

Maybe it's a job that once fulfilled you but no longer does.

Maybe it's a relationship dynamic that you've outgrown.

Maybe you've spent years being the dependable one, the caretaker, the peacemaker, the one who doesn't make waves—and you're finally wondering what you want.

And maybe getting out of the basket doesn't always mean walking away.

Sometimes it means setting a boundary, asking for what you need, trying something you've been afraid to try or changing your priorities.

Maybe nothing is terribly wrong. Maybe you've simply grown.

That's what I see when I look at these two petunia plants.

The one in the basket isn't failing. It's just outgrown its container.

And perhaps that's true for you, too.

Maybe you don't need to try harder to bloom where you are.

Maybe you need to ask yourself whether where you are still gives you room to grow.

The ground petunia didn't have a carefully planned beginning. No one intentionally planted it there. It was simply given an opportunity to take root—and it did.

It spread.

It reached.

It bloomed.

And it didn't apologize for taking up more space.

Neither should you.

The two plants had no say in where they were planted, but you do.

You get to decide when the basket that once held you has become too small.

You get to decide what needs to change.

You get to decide what "more" looks like.

And you get to give yourself permission to grow in a direction that might surprise everyone—including you.

Midlife isn't about starting over.

It's about recognizing that you've grown—and giving yourself room to bloom.

Until next time, take care of your beautiful self.

~Kim~